To some unmentionable people I know:

SECLUDED VEINS- Like the thousands of times I convinced myself I was nothing, and you are less than nothing. Shadows of my own wandering clear away as soon as I turn my head. It was to quick to remember anyway. I'm walking away thinking I'm still to scared to move. and everything you left me... your so dead to me. I've cried myself sober to many times, had myself convinced of some majestic tragedy, while you were still breathing in the next room. Maybe all i was is to escape. with a reason to escape, and maybe there is no reason but your reason, and all the reasons you've proved me wrong. tearing away all my excuses... my hate. fuck the reason. I've got all the contentment I can handle. and still I find myself hands down, empty to my throat, like all the ways *sin* was,- with dope under his nails and through his spine. He told me it was different then, and it just got to damn hard, that was a year ago... he's so weak now. and when I saw him last October, eyes glazed, pockets empty,- he wanted me to know everything was alright. and he wasnt in love with you anymore. He lit my ciggerette and told me to steer clear of the lifestyle. explaining in detail all the ways it wasnt worth his time. I never told him I was already caught up in it. I knew I wanted the same thing he did, but with my own perspective. I had my own damn reasons. I loved him with everything I had. You told me he was more vain then I could ever be, I didnt know what the fuck you were talking about.